It tastes a lot better than it sounds – I swear.

Sorry about no post yesterday, folks – I was a little swamped with my day job; I guess it’s the pre-holiday rush. Which is fine, because tonight I’m going to whip up a batch of my homemade Egg Nog. Since I always bring a bottle to a party, and keep one for when guests come by during the holidays, my recipe is for 30-40 servings. Just an obvious reminder – since these are raw eggs you’ll be working with, you should make sure to buy pasteurized eggs or egg substitutes.

Underground Egg Nog – Recipe:

• 12 Eggs – separated
• 1 cup sugar
• 1 tablespoon nutmeg
• 2 tablespoons ground cinnamon
• 1 quart heavy cream
• 1 quart milk
• 1 pint bourbon
• 1 cup dark rum or brandy

Beat the egg yolks with sugar until it dissolves. Add the cream, milk, cinnamon, nutmeg and liquor and stir. Beat the egg whites until they become fluffy, then add that in as well. Chill for several hours, then serve sprinked with nutmeg, or garnished with a cinnamon stick.

This is another cocktail that represents my inability to cope with the weather. Right now in New York, it’s cold and rainy, and has been like that all week. So, to escape, I’ve been thinking of cocktails associated with warm, sunny tropical environments. If you’re like me – in a cold place; dreaming of a warm summer evening at an outdoor bar by the ocean side – then try this Mojito recipe, and have one for me.

Mojito – Recipe:

• 3 mint sprigs (should be fresh)
• 0.5 oz simple syrup
• 1 oz fresh lime juice
• 1.5 oz light rum
• club soda

Muddle some mint leaves at the bottom of the glass. Add the simple syrup and lime juice and stir well. Next, add some ice cubes to the glass, then add the rum. Mix the ingredients, then top off with cold club soda (don’t use seltzer unless you have nothing else around). Garnish with the lime slice and the un-muddled mint sprig, and serve.

Caipirinhas are one of the many, many things to love that come from Brazil. Unlike most of them, however, you don’t need any special ointments after enjoying this one. What? I meant sunburn ointment! From all the beautiful beaches!

I kid because I love, Brazil. Also, I kid because I’m jealous that I can’t live in a quaint, quiet little Brazillian villa, sipping Caipirinhas at sunset while gazing at the landscape. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to finish up this article, then go for a jog to fill my lungs with that clean, crisp Brooklyn air that I was raised on. I call it the Smog-Jog!

Caipirinha – Recipe:

• 2 oz. Cachaça
• 1 oz simple syrup
• 1/2 lime, quartered

Place lime in a chilled old fashioned glass, then muddle with simple syrup until the lime is mushy. Add the Cachaça and cracked ice and mix well.

If you don’t have any Cachaça where you live, you can substitute it with vodka. This is called a Caipiroska. Or, if you prefer rum, add your favorite brand of light rum for the Cachaça. This is called a Caipirissima.

I don’t really have anything funny to say about the Alabama Slammer. I know there used to be a team named after the drink in the old hockey minor leagues, but that’s not really funny. It’s a damn good drink, though.

Alabama Slammer – Recipe:

• 1/2 oz amaretto almond liqueur
• 1/2 oz Southern Comfort®
• 1/2 oz sloe gin
• 1 splash sweet and sour mix
• Balance orange juice

Pour all ingredients into a cocktail shaker over ice and shake until completely cold. Strain into a glass and serve.

This name became popular after Jimi Hendrix wrote a song with this title in 1967. Many believed that it was a song about drugs, and since, many different drugs, drug related paraphernalia, and drug-inspired songs and movies have been named after Purple Haze as well. However, Hendrix said in an interview that the song had nothing to do with drugs, but instead was based on a dream where he was walking around underwater, and was surrounded by a “purple haze,” which engulfed him and led to him being lost.

Let’s just hope the same doesn’t happen to your guests after they drink this cocktail.

Purple Haze – Recipe:

• 1 oz vodka
• 1 oz chambord
• Balance cranberry juice

Mix vodka and chambord in a cocktail shaker and strain into a cocktail glass filled with ice. Balance (fill the remainder with) cranberry juice, and garnish with a cherry.

Fuzzy Navels used to be one of my favorite drinks. In fact, for about nine or ten months straight back in ’04, I ordered these every time I went out. That is, until a bartender in Brooklyn told me that it was by far the “wussiest” drink she’d ever seen a man order, told me to “be a man,” and then served me a Jack and Coke.

If you’re reading this, June – thanks for shaming me into quitting Fuzzy Navels.

She probably wouldn’t approve of this, either, but I actually put my own little spin on the fuzzy navel recipe. Hopefully, she never reads this and starts shaming me into unpublishing this recipe…

Fuzzy Navel – Recipe:

• 2 oz Peach Schnapps
• Balance Orange Juice
• Splash Triple Sec

Pour ingredients in a highball glass filled with ice. Splash with Triple Sec, and serve.

The Pina Colada is, obviously, one of the most popular drinks around – and with good reason. Pina Coladas are one of those drinks that you can have in any weather, any time of the year, to relax and unwind at the end of the week, or to make for friends for your friday night card game. The best part about making this drink for multiple people is that it’s not as expensive to make as other drinks – so you don’t have to worry about breaking the bank on your drink budget just to entertain your guests.

Pina Colada – Recipe:

• 1 can Cream of Coconut
• 1.5 oz Malibu
• 2 oz rum
• 3 oz (or balance) Pineapple Juice
• Cherries and PIneapple slices (if you have pineapple) for garnish

Fill a blender about half way with ice (more or less, it’s a cup of ice). Combine all ingredients, and blend until smooth. Pour into a parfait glass, or whatever else you’d like to serve in.

This one’s a very popular crossover drink. (In fact, I ordered a round at my friend’s birthday celebration last night – Happy birthday, Jeff.) I call it a crossover drink because it’s served as a shooter, a martini, or a regular cocktail on the rocks; depending on customer/bartender preference. This drink is obviously named after the Kamikaze pilots of World War Two, and was invented during that time period.

This drink is made with equal parts vodka, triple sec and lime juice. Here’s a quick pneumonic device to help you remember the ingredients – Kamikazes had Very Trouble Landings. VTL: Vodka, Triple Sec, Lime juice. It sounds stupid, but all pneumonic devices do; and almost all pneumonic devices work, as well.

Kamikaze – Recipe:

• 1 part Vodka
• 1 part Triple Sec
• 1 part Lime Juice

Mix and shake all ingredients with ice, strain into the glass of your choice, and serve.

This drink is why Tequila was created.

Okay, so it wasn’t. But, Margaritas are the most popular Tequila based cocktail in Mexico and, indeed, the world. It is decidedly not the reason why Tequila was invented; but, there are many distillers of the spirit whose goal, specifically, is to make Tequila for Margaritas. Margarita is a word that has different meanings in different languages: for example, in Greek, it means pearl; in Spanish, it means daisy.

As for who created the Margarita and why, as usual, there is a lot of debate on the subject. What they can agree on, of course, is that it was invented in Mexico. Yeah, OBVSLY.

And now, on to the recipe:

Margarita – Recipe:

• 2 Oz Tequila (Patron, if you want to be fancy)
• 1 Oz Triple Sec (or, if you decided to be fancy, Cointreau)
• Juice of 1 lime ( you don’t necessarily need to add this, but it’s a really nice touch)
• 0.5 Oz of Rose’s Lime Juice (or, if you used the lime juice, replace this with simple syrup
• Lime wedge for garnish

There are three principal ways to make this drink:

• Shaken in a cocktail mixer, like a martini; then strained into a glass; or
• Mixed and served on the rocks; or
• all of the ingredients are put into a blender half-filled with ice, and blended (“Frozen Margarita” style)

Many people insist on salting the rim of the glass before pouring. Although that is often the case with certain other specialty drinks (where you “salt” or “sugar” the glass before serving), salting the rim of the glass in the case of margaritas is usually something you only do if the tequila you use is cheap. This is done because the salt helps hide the crappy taste of the cheap-o liquor in the cocktail. That’s why if you go to a bar, this is the only garnish or preparation that they’ll ask you your preference of beforehand. Typically though, all you need is a lime wedge to garnish.